It’s funny to think that you all have been reading my blog post and YouTube videos for a year now, and yet all you really know about me is my Cerebral Palsy side. I mean I suppose that makes sense being that’s the whole reason I created Eyeliner and Empowerment in the first place, right? To spread awareness and give my little tips and tricks about living with a disability. I think that needs to change though, I truly stand by the term “you are not your disability” meaning yes I get it I have a disability but my disability doesn’t have me… at least most days it doesn’t and even when it does it’s not all of me. Cerebral Palsy is not your looks, interests or hobbies. There is still so much about each of us when we take Cerebral Palsy out of the equation.
Like for instance I love all things beauty from hair to makeup and fashion. I love, love. Literally. Everything about it, seeing people in love and being in love. I’m a total sucker for Valentine’s day too. So when I received an email form JORD asking to make my fiancé’s Valentine’s day extra special and to be in a partnership with them I was totally on board. To be truthful, I hadn’t heard of JORD when I received this email, but of course I went straight to the source… Instagram. I was blown away with how beautiful these wooden watches were. I was also extremely excited because I knew my fiancé would love it, especially because since we got engaged he has been saying he wants a wooden wedding ring so it knew this watch would be perfect.
JORD is a watch company that makes hand crafted wood watches that are truly unique, using 13 different wood types used alone or in combination depending on the design of the watch. Don’t get jealous ladies there is also a women’s shop as well as the men’s shop too. The one I choose for my fiancé was from the HYDE series Stacked Sandalwood & Olive with Ivory. When it arrived on our doorstep it was elegant from the start in a black matte postal package with JORD printed in white on the bottom right. When opening the box, you flip up one side and then you see it, the beautiful wooden box with a J on it. The wooden watch was placed perfectly in the middle with a small microfiber cloth and 100% natural finishing oil for your watch as well as well as a smaller polishing cloth for the face of the watch. The wooden box that your watch comes in is beautiful, with a magnetic top that comes on and off and a small draw on the bottom. JORD did not skimp with their packaging, it was truly high quality from the moment the package was in my hand.
Opening up and seeing my fiancés new watch for the first time brought so much excitement to me. It was simply perfect. I like to describe it as the wooden “Rolex”. The quality was strong and sturdy, it was trendy yet beautiful and elegant. The best part is your JORD watch comes sized and ready for you to wear along with the option to have it engraved. It was so perfect and I was so excited to give it to my fiancé I couldn’t wait for Valentine’s Day and decided to give it to him early. To say the least, he loved it, like I knew he would. His favorite part was the large watch face along with the small details that JORD puts into their watches to make them perfect.
Well now that I made you all fall in love with JORD this Valentine’s you have a chance to get a great discount of your own. If you enter you will have a chance to win a $100 gift code to use on the JORD site! One lucky person will win but everyone who enters will receive a 10% off code once the contest it over.
Giveaway link: https://www.jordwatches.com/g/eyelinerandempowerment
The giveaway will close February 18th at 11:59pm.
The $100 and 10% off Coupon Codes will expire March 4th for the one lucky winner and all participants.
Today I am happy and I say that with a smile on my face, a real smile with meaning behind it. Not that fake smile that I hid behind for years of my life. As I write this my eyes fill up with tears, tears of acceptance, relief, accomplishment and happiness. The past years were brutal it was a constant battle of accepting myself and trying to find true happiness. Let me tell you, the truth is it takes time; a lot of time. Happiness just doesn’t come in the blink of an eye. Loving and accepting yourself the way you are doesn’t happen on a wish of a shooting star. True happiness doesn’t come easily and the biggest thing I learned is that to be happy and to feel happy are two totally different things. I learned that the hard way, by letting someone’s opinion of me take away my self-image and happiness. I had to fight like hell to get it back. I was so focused on being in love and having someone love me that I didn’t realize I was being mistreated, and once I realized what had happened to me I knew I had to change my mindset and work on myself.
The true lesson of life isn’t to love yourself it really is to accept who you are today. Accept every little flaw that makes you who you are too. Sometimes it’s so easy to get caught up in others people’s lives and others appearance. That’s when the saying “The grass looks greener on the other side” comes into play. You have to accept yourself with no makeup on. Accept yourself with that extra five pounds that you hate. Accept everything you hate about yourself and learn to love it, because once you do it will be a lot easier to strive to be a happier and healthier version of yourself. Never let one person change your self-image because you have to know that you are enough and you will always be loved. The most important person to have love you is yourself and once you realize that you will be truly happy.
Today I do have someone special that loves me, and she is looking right back at me in the mirror. I accept myself and I love every little flaw about me that makes me who I am today, and most importantly I got my happiness back, and it never felt so good. I may have not been made the way I would have chosen but I am the exact way God wanted me to be. Although he didn’t give me the perfect legs, he gave me so many other qualities that made me who I am today. He gave me incredible strength, a caring heart, a selfless personality. He gave me beauty and confidence. He gave me all the qualities that made me the women I’m supposed to be today.
The truth is everyone has a daily fight, whether we want to admit it or not. The only difference between you and me is you can see mine; I can’t hide it or pretend that it doesn’t exist. It does exist and each day that I’m fighting my battle head on and it’s out in the open for the public to see. I used to think that it was unfair and I would wish I had a different battle to fight one that I could hide, but why? What’s the point? So what you can see my fight, but you can also see my determination, my progress and my pride. My pride of which I am, my determination of making myself stronger each and every day and my progress of how far I come. My fight made me the women I am today and the women I’m supposed to be, and I would never want to change that.
This week lets chat about dating. If you want me to be honest I hate the whole dating thing, I have always been that hopeless romantic girl who falls way too hard way to quick. I guess I watched The Notebook one too many times. Dating is difficult to begin with especially in this day and age and I hate to say it but dating with a disability puts a twist on things. Let me give you a background on my dating history. It all started the last few days of middle school, it started out like your typical first relationship would start…the night before when his friends tell your friends that you’re going to get asked to be his girlfriend after 3rd period science class. Let’s be real, being the mama’s girl that I am I ran and told my mom, I was confused because I thought it was a joke, no one ever wanted to date me before. I was always self-conscious of the way I walked due to my cerebral palsy, so of course I had that in the back of my mind. My mom gave me her first of many boy pep talks; she explained that there is so much more to me beyond my walking, that I am beautiful and have an amazing personality, and if a boy doesn’t like me because of the way I walked then I don’t want to date him anyway, and since then that stuck in my mind. Well, the bell rang and my heart dropped within 3 minutes of everyone else switching classes I had my first kiss and I was a girlfriend just like that.
I personally think that after you get out of high school it’s a thousand times easier to date, people are more knowledgeable and don’t care about a silly limp. Throughout my experience I can basically describe people in three different ways when they are faced with dating someone with a disability. There are the ones that see beyond the disability, there’s the ones who plain and simply won’t date you because of it and of course my personal favorite, the ones that like you and want to date you, but won’t because they are scared of what their friends might think. Now, I do not judge because I don’t know what it’s like to date someone with a disability… however on the other hand I know what’s it’s like to date with one. I also know that pit in the middle of your stomach when you know someone doesn’t like you because of your disability. I know what it’s like when you have to walk past your crush and you try and do your “best walking” you know the slow and steady, heal to toe one what we all learn at physical therapy. I have had amazing boyfriends that respected and didn’t think twice about my walking but then again on the other hand I had boyfriends that weren’t so respectful when it came to my disability. Just like anyone with or without a disability you have to know yourself worth and do not settle for anything less than what you deserve. It’s so easy to lose yourself in a relationship it happens to plenty of people and it happened to me.
People are going to come in and out of your life for many different reasons, they are either going to love you and bring happiness into your life or just be a lesson learned, with that being said I believe that each lesson you learn from a past relationship will make you stronger for the next, each person you date good or bad is getting you ready for your future husband/wife. Of course I got my heart broken, turned down and disappointed in a relationship, I wouldn’t be human if I didn’t. I’ll be honest, my biggest flaw in dating was always thinking that it was my walking. I always had it in the back of my mind. Every time someone broke up with me or didn’t want to date me that was the reason in my head. I gave myself zero credit when it came to my self-worth. I had to sit down and literally write down all the good things and bad things about me and completely eliminated Cerebral Palsy out of the equation. When I looked at the list, I had a lot of good things to offer and I had other bad qualities about myself that didn’t even have to do with my disability. It was good to see and get in my mind that it’s not always about Cerebral Palsy. So when you’re out there learn from my mistakes never forget your self-worth and don’t always assume it’s your disability, because people who don’t have a disability are going through the same dating problems as you.